What Does a Gaslighting Boss Look Like?

January 7, 2023

Behavior Identification

If you’ve ever worked for a boss who made you doubt your own sanity, you might have encountered a gaslighting boss. These types of bosses use manipulation and mind games to control and disorient their employees, making them question their own perceptions and memories.

Here are 7 characteristics to watch out for:

    1. Constant contradiction:

    A gaslighting boss will often directly contradict what you or others have said, even when there is evidence to the contrary. For example, if you present a report with data to support your argument, a gaslighting boss might claim that the data is wrong or that you misinterpreted it.

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    2. Denial:

    Gaslighting bosses will often deny saying or doing things that you know they said or did. They might claim that you “misremembered” the conversation or event, or that you’re “making things up.”

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    3. Blaming:

    Gaslighting bosses are experts at shifting the blame and making their employees feel like they’re the ones at fault. If something goes wrong, they’ll find a way to pin the blame on you or someone else on the team, even if it’s not warranted.

    my boss doesn't give clear instructions

    4. Isolation:

    Gaslighting bosses will often try to isolate their employees from other people in the company or from outside support. They might discourage you from seeking help from colleagues or from speaking up about problems.

    What to do when you feel disrespected by your boss?

    5. Confusion:

    Gaslighting bosses are skilled at creating confusion and uncertainty. They might change their expectations or instructions frequently, or give conflicting feedback. This can make it difficult for employees to know what they’re supposed to be doing or how they’re supposed to be doing it.

    9 Obvious Signs of an Emotionally Abusive Boss

    6. Gaslighting:

    The term “gaslighting” comes from the 1938 play “Gas Light,” in which a husband tries to convince his wife that she’s going crazy by dimming the lights in their house and denying that it’s happening. A gaslighting boss might try to do the same thing, by making you doubt your own perceptions and memories.

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    7. Emotional abuse:

    Gaslighting bosses often use emotional abuse as a way to control and manipulate their employees. They might use insults, threats, or other tactics to make you feel small or worthless.

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    # Remember this:

    Not all bosses who exhibit some of these characteristics are gaslighting. However, if you’re consistently feeling confused, uncertain, or like you’re going crazy at work, it’s worth taking a step back and considering whether you’re dealing with a gaslighting boss. And remember, it’s not your fault if you are – the problem is with the boss, not you.

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