Gaslighting at Work: The Dangers of Living in an Alternate Reality

February 5, 2023

Strategy

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that is used to make someone question their own perception of reality. This tactic can be particularly devastating in the workplace, where employees rely on their bosses for guidance, support, and professional development. If your boss is engaging in gaslighting, it can make you feel like you are going crazy and cause you to doubt your abilities, judgment, and worth as an employee.

    toxic boss syndrome

    If you’ve ever watched the 1944 film “Gaslight,” or heard of the term “gaslighting,” you know how devastating it can be to be manipulated into questioning your own perceptions of reality. Unfortunately, this type of psychological abuse is not limited to Hollywood movies. In the workplace, gaslighting can occur when a boss denies facts, makes unreasonable demands, and blames others in order to assert their power and control over others.

    What to do when you feel disrespected by your boss?

    Gaslighting can leave employees feeling confused, disoriented, and second-guessing themselves. This is because the manipulative tactics used in gaslighting create an alternate reality where the victim is made to feel that their perceptions and memories are wrong, while the abuser is portrayed as always right and in control. In the film “Gaslight,” the protagonist is told by her husband that she is losing her mind, and is made to believe that she is forgetful and unreliable. In a similar vein, gaslighting bosses can create a work environment where employees feel like they can never do anything right, and that their perceptions and memories are flawed.

    What to do when you feel disrespected by your boss?

    Spotting a Gaslighter at Work

    If your boss frequently denies facts, makes unreasonable demands, and shifts responsibility for mistakes, these could be signs of gaslighting. Additionally, if your boss creates an alternate reality where they are always right and you are always wrong, this is another red flag.

    It’s important to pay attention to your gut instincts and to trust your own perceptions and memories. If you feel like your boss is engaging in gaslighting, don’t dismiss your feelings. Instead, take steps to protect your well-being and professional success. This may include keeping records of events, building a network of supportive colleagues, and seeking support from HR or other resources.

    Is Gaslighting the Same as Bullying?

    Gaslighting and bullying can share some similarities, but they are not the same thing. Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which the manipulator seeks to make the victim question their own perceptions and memories. This can be done through denying facts, shifting responsibility, and creating an alternate reality.

    Bullying, on the other hand, involves repeated, intentional aggression, either physical or psychological, from one person towards another. While bullying can include gaslighting as a form of psychological abuse, it can also take other forms such as physical aggression, verbal abuse, or social exclusion.

    Both gaslighting and bullying can have a profound and lasting impact on the victim and it’s important to recognize and address these behaviors in the workplace or in any other relationship.

    These examples highlight the devastating impact of gaslighting and the importance of recognizing and resisting this form of manipulation. If you suspect that you or someone you know is being gaslighted, it’s important to seek support and to take steps to protect your well-being. Remember, gaslighting is a form of abuse, and you deserve to live in a reality where your perceptions and memories are respected.

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