First of all, if you are here chances are high that your boss is toxic. But how toxic can he be? Well, having in mind that people tend to change their behavior when in a position of power, I would say, your boss may be pretty much toxic. Maybe even more than you are aware of. 

When I encountered my toxic boss for the first time, I wasn’t aware that she was toxic. I was sure that her behavior was highly business oriented and all the things she was doing I saw as part of the job, something that was needed to be done no matter what (the whole story on my toxic boss, you may find here).

There’s one thing people tend to forget.

We, humans, are addicted to authority. 

The best way to understand how authority works is to know what happened when the experiment, later on called The Milgram Shock Experiment, was conducted.

Knowing this, you will be less influenced by authority. So, let me explain a bit about what happened there and why is so important for us today.

When Adolf Eichmann, one of the main figures responsible for the killing of millions in WW2, was put on trial, he said he was just following orders.

This kind of statement makes you rethink the idea of evil.

Perhaps evil happens when people stop thinking by themselves and just obey the orders of others. This was the idea around which Stanley Milgram conducted his experiment on obedience. 

Participants were led to believe that they were assisting an unrelated experiment, in which they had to administer electric shocks to a “learner.” These fake electric shocks gradually increased to levels that would have been fatal had they been real. 

So, to make it simple, a person was sitting in a room (with a scientist who was monitoring the process) and the task was to give an electric shock to a learner in another room in case the learner gives a wrong answer.

After a few wrong answers, you would hear screams and beggings from the room where the learner is. But you would be instructed to proceed with giving the electric shocks. What would you do? I know the answer is obvious, you would stop. But, that is actually what every person would think. In reality, humans behave differently. 

Results of the experiment?

Milgram’s first set of experiments, 65 percent (26 of 40) of experiment participants administered the experiment’s final massive 450-volt shock, and all administered shocks of at least 300 volts. Subjects were uncomfortable doing so and displayed varying degrees of tension and stress. Every participant paused the experiment at least once to question it. Most continued after being assured by the experimenter. Some said they would refund the money they were paid for participating. But, what we have revealed here is that after the experimenter (an authority in this case) gives you an order, you are very likely to obey it no matter what. 

Now, the question is, why do we do this?

Well, this comes so naturally to us, humans. Our ancestors used the organization of hierarchy to survive, animals do it in order to survive, we in our everyday lives seek information by finding the right authority… School systems, our parents, our superiors tend to punish us if we disobey and cherish us if we obey. 

This means that if you are in a workplace, you need to be aware of this human tendency and always try to think the decisions trough.

The authority is not always right.

Just because someone is in a superior position at your company and is giving you orders, it doesn’t mean it has the power to change your beliefs. Don’t ever stop thinking by yourself and don’t just follow the orders. It is crucial for you to remember that.

Now, back to that toxic boss and his behavior. 

We now know that obedience is very natural to humans so we will not be caught in a trap in which we obey blindly our boss. We now question his acts and we see toxic behaviors with other eyes. 

Having that in mind, if you spot these behaviors bellows, you may be caught up with a toxic boss: 

1. Your boss is coming late when you must be on time

Of course, this is not always the toxic behavior but if you are called out every time you come late while your boss is coming late every day, it is just not fair. It doesn’t matter if he/she is in a superior position. If you work together, the rules apply to everyone in the same way. You will feel undervalued by this kind of behavior. 

2. Your boss is micromanaging and double-checking your work

Another behavior that triggers employees to feel undervalued. If you are just starting, it is ok for a boss to check your work but if you are working for quite some time, this kind of behavior communicates to the employee that superiors have zero faith in their skills and capabilities, which leads to an extreme state of discontentment. Good bosses will let you be independent, they know that there is a risk of you making a mistake, but they are willing to take chances in order to have one hell of a team to support them. 

3. Your boss is not sharing all the information with you

This is a typical toxic boss behavior. These kinds of bosses love to have all the power to themselves. This basically means that if they know something will change in the office, they tend to keep the information all to themselves for as long as they can. This makes them (in their mind) very powerful. It is something you should be aware of because it may lead you to many awkward situations with your boss.

4. Your boss is not ever asking for help

Toxic bosses see themselves as know-it-alls, even when they are highly ignorant. Their ego will prevent them from asking you, even though your solution maybe even 100 times better than theirs. This seems so crazy, but a toxic boss would rather make a mistake than admit they know less and ask for another opinion. They would feel less in power if they would admit they don’t know something. 

5. Your boss is hesitant on giving you a day off

You may get that day off eventually, but the toxic boss will make the act of asking a very uncomfortable subject so even if you know you have the right to take the day off, you will feel like you didn’t deserve it and you would feel scared to even ask. The toxic boss doesn’t like their employees to have a good time when they are not at work. 

6. Your boss does not give clear instructions on what you should do

Toxic bosses are people of few words when it comes to planning and strategizing. Why is that? Their goal is not finishing successfully a given task but to set themselves above others. So, if you are all working on a task, the toxic boss is not oriented on a task, his/her only preoccupation is to boss around and to be great at it. This creates a communication gap, leading to employees staying in a state of bafflement all the time. This, in turn, results in more mistakes, which complicates the situation even further.

7. Your boss is taking all the credits for your work

This may lead to a serious problem. It may start as a common thing, but if this keeps happening all the time, the employee will feel discomfort and soon will have no motivation to keep working as hard as he/she did so far since all the credits are taken by his/her boss. You work hard on a project and submit it, expecting at least an affirmation of a job well done from your supervisor, only to find that he/she took the credit for all your work. This behavior should be very alarming if you notice it, no boss should behave like that.

8. Your boss is struggling when it comes to coaching employees

They get frustrated when expected to coach and train employees. They feel uncomfortable when they need to share their knowledge because they think of themselves as brilliant ones, they don’t like sharing their brilliance with anyone. Even when they head a coaching session, you can feel their unwillingness. As a result, these sessions are just a waste of time and resources, and never achieve their promised objectives.

9. Your boss doesn’t take care of his/her employees

Let’s put aside business for a moment and go to a human side a bit. Good bosses are good people first of all. So, if employees are having some kind of difficulties, a good boss is there for them, talk to them, trying to find the right solution and manage the private problems and business problems of an employee in the best possible way. The toxic boss is not interested in what is going on with you privately, his/her actions are strictly business oriented and every human aspect is exempt from his/her behavior. 

10. Your boss is saying one thing, then saying completely different

Think about it, you are at your job, working a task which your boss gave it to you. You complete it but your boss is confused. Your boss is saying you didn’t do right, you didn’t follow his/her instructions and starts saying the complete opposite of which he said previously. This kind of behavior is highly associated with toxic bosses and may be very hard to handle. 

11. Your boss stays in his/her office and passes around order

Since these kinds of bosses don’t like to work as hard as they expect form their employees, they tend to hide in their office so they can escape their obligations. It is their field of power and they like to boss around directly from the chair. When no one is looking, they usually spend their time at work doing everything else except actually working but would tell everyone how much work they have on their mind. 

12. Your boss points out your mistakes but ignores your successes

Another typical behavior of these kinds of bosses. Every time you make a mistake, you would be put on a severe interrogation and when you do a great job there’s no one to point that out. Great work is considered a normal thing so there is nothing special when you are doing great. Good bosses are not afraid to publicly recognize productive employees for their contributions.

13. Your boss is giving you way too much work

There are plenty of reasons why your boss is overly demanding. Employees often feel as though nothing they accomplish is ever enough. If you are constantly given an unreasonable amount of work and your stressing out about deadlines, the truth is, your boss may be overly demanding. These kinds of bosses are also part of the toxic boss group since employees often beat themselves up by thinking they are not good enough when the truth is they are simply overloaded. 

14. Your boss is praising someone else for your work

This one is not so common but it is one of the characteristics of a toxic boss. If you notice your boss is praising your colleague too much, it might mean that you are the target (even though it is not always the case). The toxic boss will try to diminish your work simply by not recognizing the effort you put in and praising someone who put in less more effort than you. Employees end up feeling undervalued and underappreciated. 

15. Your boss is always pointing out how much work he/she has

Of course, your boss wouldn’t admit that he/she has less work than you. If this statement is true, your boss will always try to highlight his/her own achievements (because your boss is afraid you will notice that his/her work is less demanding than yours).

16. Your boss is never taking responsibility

Toxic bosses are taking credits but not responsibility. Every time there is a mess at work, your boss finds someone to blame. It is never his/her fault, the toxic boss always pinpoints at someone else. Even when he/she makes a decision that ends up being wrong, the toxic boss won’t say he/she was wrong but find someone or something else to blame the failure upon. According to a BambooHR survey, as many as 20% of those surveyed thought that management “passing the buck” was a deal-breaker that would make them want to leave their current jobs. 

17. Your boss stays late in the office

If your boss consistently shows up to work earlier than you and stays much later than you, it can create a toxic environment for everyone. Yes, we have mentioned before it is bad if a boss comes later than you but when he/she is showing up earlier than you it can put a lot of pressure on the employees to do the same. You have to keep in mind that you are less paid than your boss and you are not obligated to stay late.

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