Are you doubting whether your boss is gaslighting you? These 12 signs may help you figure it out.

1. They constantly question your memory. “I swear I never said that” or “That never happened” are phrases you hear often from a gaslighting boss. Remember, your memory is real, don’t let them make you doubt yourself.

2. They make you question your sanity. If your boss makes you feel like you’re going crazy, it might be gaslighting. Just remember, you’re not losing it, you’re just dealing with a tricky boss.

3. They play the victim. A gaslighting boss will often play the victim and make you feel like you’re the one causing the problems. “Why are you always picking on me?”, Sound familiar?

4. They deflect responsibility. A gaslighting boss will deflect responsibility and blame others for their mistakes. Just like the classic line from The Office, “That’s not a mistake, that’s an opportunity”.

5. They minimize your accomplishments. A gaslighting boss will often minimize your accomplishments and make you feel like you’re not good enough. Don’t let them bring you down, you’re a rockstar!

6. They constantly change the rules. A gaslighting boss will often change the rules and expectations on a whim, leaving you feeling confused and frustrated. Just like Ferris Bueller said “Life moves pretty fast, if you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

7. They use your insecurities against you:

A gaslighting boss will often use your insecurities against you to make you feel weak and vulnerable. They may exploit your fears, doubts, or weaknesses to control and manipulate you.

For example, if you are insecure about your public speaking skills, they may deliberately put you in situations where you have to give presentations or speak in public, knowing that it will make you uncomfortable. They may also make comments or criticisms that play on your insecurities, such as telling you that you’re not good enough or that you’re not cut out for the job. It’s important to remember that these insecurities are not a reflection of your worth or abilities, and that you can take steps to build your confidence and resilience.

8. They isolate you from others:

A gaslighting boss will often try to isolate you from your colleagues and friends to make you more reliant on them. They may discourage or prevent you from communicating with others, or create a culture of fear and mistrust that makes it difficult for you to form connections with others. They may also deliberately spread rumors or lies about you to damage your reputation and relationships with others. This isolation can be very isolating and disorienting, and it’s important to remember that you don’t have to go through it alone. Seek out support from friends, family, or a therapist, and try to maintain a sense of connection with others.

9. They deny their behavior. A gaslighting boss will often deny their behavior, even when confronted with evidence. Just like in the movie Liar Liar, “I’m not lying”.

10. They use “gaslighting phrases” such as “you’re too sensitive” or “you’re overreacting.” These phrases are designed to make you doubt your own feelings and experiences. Don’t let them invalidate your feelings.

11. They use charm and charisma to manipulate you. A gaslighting boss may come across as charming and charismatic, but don’t be fooled. They may be using this as a tool to manipulate you.

12. They make you feel guilty for their mistakes. A gaslighting boss will often make you feel guilty for their mistakes, making you take the blame. Don’t let them put the blame on you.

If you recognize any of these signs in your boss, you may be dealing with a gaslighter. Remember, gaslighting is a form of manipulation and abuse, and it’s important to take steps to protect yourself. And don’t forget to laugh, it’s the best medicine!

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